Do you love your neighbors? I do; well most of them anyway. We have unfortunately acquired some new neighbors over the past year that leave much to be desired. B.O.B. Bob has an often-told story in his family about “The Tukhoes,” a family that lived next to his for many years. I’m pretty sure I’ve spelled the name wrong, but that doesn’t matter; it’s all about the pronunciation. You must say “The Tuckhoes” like you are saying the dirtiest swear word you could possibly imagine, while rolling your eyes dramatically at the same time. His family and theirs were basically archenemies. I never really heard the story about how this feud came to be, but I do know that when their name was uttered you were to respond by appropriately rolling your eyes and acknowledging that “The Tuckhoes” were in some serious need of extra brain cells, and that if a plane were to crash into the community, you were to pray with all you had that it hit only their house.
That feeling is sort of what I’m feeling towards our new neighbors. Maybe a plane crashing on top of their roof could be the best thing to happen; perhaps then they’d move. I would no longer have “The Lurker” as I like to call him, creeping me out on a very regular basis. We all have that feeling sometimes that a person is just not right, and in this case, I’m choosing to embrace that feeling. There will be no “How do you do’s?” over the fence. There will be no nods of the head as if to say, “Have a nice day.” Nope folks, none of that’s gonna happen. When all of the other surrounding neighbors pretty much feel that something is just not quite right as well, you need to pay attention to that shit. You need to decide that sometimes it’s all right not to be friendly. When a person can make your skin crawl in one “lurking” glance, you need to just stay the hell away. It’s perfectly understandable to not deliver welcome cookies to “The Lurkers,” because creepy, unpleasant, disturbing, weird, lurker neighbors don’t deserve yummy Brown Butter Oatmeal Chocolate Chunk Cookies. We save those for the neighbors we like.
- 12 Tablespoons Unsalted Butter
- 2 Cups Oatmeal
- 1 Cup All-Purpose Flour
- 1 Teaspoon Kosher Salt
- 1/2 Teaspoon Baking Soda
- 1/2 Teaspoon Ground Cinnamon
- 1/4 Teaspoon Freshly Ground Nutmeg
- 1 1/2-Cups Light Brown Sugar, Packed
- 1 Whole Egg + 1 Egg Yolk
- 1 Tablespoon Vanilla Extract
- 1 (10-oz.) Package Chocolate Chunks
- In a small saucepan, brown the butter over medium-high heat for 5 minutes, or until just lightly browned.
- Pour the brown butter into a small oven-safe dish, and then place in the freezer.
- Place 1-cup of the oatmeal into a food processor for 15 seconds.
- Whisk together the processed oats, unprocessed oats, flour, salt, baking soda, cinnamon, and nutmeg in a medium bowl; set aside.
- In a large mixing bowl, cream the cooled butter and brown sugar on medium speed for 3 minutes.
- Add the eggs; mix for 2 minutes.
- Add the vanilla; mix for 1 minute.
- Fold the chocolate chunks into the cookie dough with a silicone spatula.
- Use a cookie scoop to evenly measure out the cookie dough and then place each cookie onto a Silpat or parchment paper lined baking sheet.
- Bake for 9 minutes.
- Allow to cool on the baking sheet for 5 minutes, before removing to a wire rack to finish cooling completely.
- You can use whichever type of chocolate you prefer in this recipe; milk chocolate, dark chocolate, and white chocolate will be equally delicious.
- Stay away from “The Lurkers.”
- Add chopped pecans or walnuts to the cookie dough.
- Serve with Chocolate Chocolate Simple Ice Cream.
I’ll be joining the Fiesta Friday Link Party today. Head on over HERE to see what everyone else is bringing to the celebration.
Come Join Us in the Kitchen!
Subscribe to Faith, Hope, Love, & Luck Survive Despite a Whiskered Accomplice to receive exclusive recipes, newsletters, and special updates.